


Impractical Camouflage

by LadyMarita



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist (Anime 2003), Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: F/M, Maid Costume
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-17
Updated: 2021-01-17
Packaged: 2021-03-15 15:54:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 784
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28815945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyMarita/pseuds/LadyMarita
Summary: Reason why Riza didn't get permission to participate in a certain mission. Royai.
Relationships: Riza Hawkeye & Roy Mustang, Riza Hawkeye/Roy Mustang
Kudos: 8





	Impractical Camouflage

**Author's Note:**

> Translation of my old story published originally on fanfiction.net

Colonel Roy Mustang felt that, at this very moment, his most hidden dream came true. Dream of which he hadn’t been aware so far. Dream, it would seem completely unreal and impossible to fulfil. Or not. Because right now in the centre of his office stood no other than lieutenant Riza Hawkeye wearing a miniskirt. Yet that’s not the end of it! The woman was dressed in very skimpy clothes imitating maid’s outfit. On freely loosed hair rested a white, lacy band, below that a more revealing than covering black, leather top, matching the colour of the mentioned skirt. Small-sized (or more accurately small-surfaced) half apron was tied on her hips and on her legs were proudly presented fishnet knee-length socks and high-heels. Huge impression was slightly spoiled by a very annoyed look of her face which clearly meant: ‘Say anything and my gun will accidentally shoot the place where it hurts the most!’

Roy couldn’t utter one single word. He rarely, or rather never, had a feeling that he is meaningless, poor, totally out-shined by the other person dust. Now he felt like that. He was looking at his subordinate with wide opened eyes and a stupid facial expression. _And I wanted to assign Fullmetal for this mission!_ he thought with disbelief. Rough Riza’s voice pulled him out of his thoughts.

‘Colonel, I think that this costume isn’t suitable for several reasons. I know the man, whom I must spy on and get the plan of his next heist, is, quoting our previous agent, an ‘old pervert’. But firstly it’s too licentious, even for an escort. This can cause suspicion. The same applies to the fact that it’s precisely a maid’s outfit, which, according to another information given by our agent, turns him on the most. How could I know that beforehand? He is said to ask these... eee... ladies for entertainment to change on the spot. Secondly it’s very uncomfortable and can make escaping or chasing hard. Besides that this skirt shows a lot so I wouldn't be able to hide a gun. That's all what I wanted to tell you, sir. I hope that you at least partially agree with my arguments, colonel' at the end of her long statement Riza stood up proudly. She knew what can happen right now- colonel is going to try to convince her that she's very wrong, that's for sure. But unexpectedly for her Roy nodded in agreement.

'You are absolutely right. This outfit is inadequate.'

Riza thought she will have a heart attack in a moment. Since when does colonel agree with someone who is undermining his own ideas?

'Besides' he added 'I had had some time for thinking and came to the conclusion that this mission wouldn't be anything pleasant for you. Let's say that I let you off the hook' he smiled in a slightly waggish way.

'But sir, just twenty minutes ago you said yourself that I have to come here to show myself before going into the field. So is this 'some time' the last twenty minutes?' Riza would never admit it but she was relieved she won't have to spy on some deviants suspected for robbery and deals with the mafia.

'March off before I change my mind', Roy said in his usual tone, 'and call Edward Elric here as quickly as possible. I think he will complete his assignment with pleasure and make a thorough report. Moreover I'm very curious how he will look in these clothes' Roy's smile became much wider with last sentence.

Riza was already opening her mouth to say something but Roy interrupted her with a fast wave of his hand.

'Just in case I will order him to stuff his bra with tissues. Someone who doesn't know him won't find out.'

Riza sympathized with Ed with all of her heart but she was happy she didn't draw the shortest straw. When she was opening the door to come out she heard a grunt.

'And one more thing. I suggest you to go to the nearest bathroom as soon as possible and get changed before somebody sees you. It's indecent for an unmarried woman to show herself to a man in such attire.'

'Yes, sir', Riza said closing the door behind her.

…

After she left Roy stretched comfortably in his armchair and put his hands behind his head. He had to admit that lieutenant Hawkeye looked lovely in that outfit. That view is undeniably worth a lot. Fortunately she wasn't eager to take part in this mission so he quickly convinced her to resign. After all he couldn't let any man (except himself, of course) to see his beloved Riza looking that way, right?


End file.
